I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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