if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize