Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I just found puke in my bra..
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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