He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Randomize
