yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
You took a bar mat shot.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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