You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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