I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
