Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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