i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
either way he was missing a nipple.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Randomize
