Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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