Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
All the doctor said was why
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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