How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
