My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
