So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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