bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Randomize
