out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
