I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Randomize
