If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i permit you to call me
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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