I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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