just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Randomize
