do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize
