dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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