similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize