have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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