I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
