Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
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