he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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