i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
