two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
