Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
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