that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Did we literally take a cab across the street
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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