I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
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