Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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