So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
