Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
