if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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