I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
