Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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