If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize