My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize
