There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
