I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
