READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
