just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Randomize