Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
