Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
