i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
When did angry sex become our thing?
A+ Viking dick
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
