im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
