I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
