She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
foreskin is a definite game changer
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
