Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
